I'm back now!

Sorry about the prolonged absence, but this is "open-enrollment" time, and in HR land that just means.... well, yuck!
I have been continuing to go to the gym during lunch on Mon/Wed/Fri. I enjoy it and am doing my body good. I have also been going to TOPS on Thursday evenings. Last night at weigh-in I had lost only .5 lbs. I am fighting being discouraged by that. I feel like with all that I am doing, it should be more - but then, I have to keep in mind that I am doing this to become more healthy, not just lose weight. I can't put all my "health eggs" in the weight loss basket because I will always end up being discouraged.
I need to keep my food diary more consistantly. I have not done that at all for about a week (hmmmm.... do you think there might be a connection to the half pound weight loss???). I don't want this to consume too much of my time or thoughts though - you know, it's back to that all-or-nothing side of me. I don't want to be consumed by this - just make it second nature. Although, maybe I should keep up the diary until this does become second nature and I have formed life-long habits. Yes... I'll do that.
Well, I'm off to the gym again...
I am attaching a link to a pretty interesting article that my daughter sent to me.
Enjoy!! A =-)
http://health.msn.com/nutrition/slideshow.aspx?cp-documentid=100168275&imageindex=1

TOPS results...

So, Thursday night is TOPS night. Last Thursday I had lost 2 lbs. That may not sound like much, but I refuse to be dissatisfied with it. It's progress, and that's all I'm asking for at this point. Tops is good for me personally because I need the accountability to prod me, kind of like doing this blog. I have promised myself that I will share my successes and my failures. I just don't want to have to put alot of failures down on "paper"! I also don't want to have some big event that I'm trying to lose weight for (remember - it's different this time). I dont want to have to lose 20 bls by X date to be comfortable going to see my family, or go to that class reunion or family vacation. I just want to get healthy!
That said - we have started a new challenge at TOPS to be the "biggest loser" by the Thursday before Valentine's day. I'm not sure what the prize is, or even if there is a prize, but as Kevin (from Home Alone) would say, "I'll give it a whirl". I have a life-long friend that is going to TOPS with me, so that helps keep me inspired to go - and besides - I want to beat her! =-)
I didn't have a great weekend. Ugh... here goes the first set back (I dont want to have to share another one). I found myself alone most of the weekend - for the first time in a very long time. I layed around and watched movies all weekend! I loved it!! I didn't eat any junk and stayed very close to my 1400 calorie goal, but didn't exercise much. I spent 10 to 15 minutes on the stationary bike and did some house cleaning, but that's pretty much it. Because of the sub-zero temps we have had alot of lately it's just been hard to get outside. But, even so - this morning my pants were a hair looser than normal. That rocks!

TOPS tonight

I have done well the last few days. I finally got the stationary bike home. I haven’t had much time to get on it, but have done a few minutes here and there. Because I am endeavoring to make this a life long change, I figure every little bit helps. I have also been doing short walks at work, taking the stairs and doing leg lifts under my desk. I guess it all adds up.
I will be going to TOPS tonight for my first follow-up weigh in. Keep your fingers crossed! It’s a little scary. I am trying to convince myself that even if I have not lost any weight that I will not get discouraged and give up. It’s going to be different this time! The emphasis is on being more healthy – not only weight loss. I have to be doing my insides more good. Eventually the outside will follow suit. Right?
One of the strategies I have been using is that every morning when I’m doing my hair and make-up I have a poster board in front of me with inspiring pictures of things like a hammock, a beach, a sun dress, new down hill skis – things I would like to wear and see, and places I would like to go, but would like to feel more energetic and, lets face it – thinner – when I get there! For me, this is a great tool! The poster board pictures keep my goals in my mind all day long and I am a firm believer in visualization!
So – wish me luck at my weigh in tonight! Alice =-)

I made it through my first weekend!

So far, so good. The weekend didn't go too badly. I stayed within my 1400 calorie limit, but didnt exercise much... ok, not at all. I just couldn't seem to muster up the "umph" to get out there in that freezing cold weather. So, the only thing to be done is to bring the exercise to me! I bought a stationary bike (I know - so yesterday!) and will go pick it up tonight. I figured I could do that even if I want to watch TV or hang with the family. Now I just need to get one of those big metal tractor seats for it! Yes - ugly! But sooooo comfortable!
Issue of the day: my all-or-nothing personality trait. I am beginning to realize that the all-or-nothing way of life is just not working for me! That elephant cannot be swallowed in one big gulp. I need to be willing to take little bites and be satisfied. Now the hard part comes - how do I do that!? Any suggestions would be great... I need specifics though - How do I become someone who can be satisfied with baby steps and not have the need for gigantic leaps. I'll still end up in the same place, wont I? Yes! I'll work on this...

Day one!

Well, here we are at the end of day one. The first step has been taken. Whew!
I did well today. I stayed within my guide lines of 1400 calories. I got out of my chair alot more today and will really exercise when I get home tonight.
I sent out the email invitation at work, which was even more difficult than I had anticipated. I wrote the email and mentioned a couple of times in it that I wanted to be more healthy and eat more healthy - but instead of writing healthy, I wrote "health"... twice! I read that email at least 4 times before I hit the "send" button and never noticed the type-o until later. Could it have been because I was distracted by the sound of my heart beating in my ears and the feeling of sheer terror?! Maybe. You know, inviting people to witness your personal struglle is a little like going into labor. Once you've hit the "send" button, there is no backing out! That can be terrifying! Maybe that's why I have decided to do this. It's hard to back out of something that everyone is watching. This would bring me to the first topic I have decided to address: The fear of reaching my goal. Yes... I said fear. It's not the losing weight that is so scary, but the thought of one more failed attempt. I have been on so many weight loss diets, gimmics and supplements that I have lost count. Obviously, none of them have worked permanently. I have decided that the only thing that will work permanently is to permanently change my "food life". I have always known this, but thought I could cheat by getting there (to my goal) quickly THEN start the life change. Again... it obviously hasn't worked. There is more to the old addage, "The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step"! See, it's not just the small step that gets you started on the path, but it's also (and maybe more so) the fact that that huge thousand mile journey HAS to be taken in small steps. Hmmmm... maybe a better analogy would be, "How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time!"
The real fear isn't so much in failing to reach my goal, but more so failing AFTER I reach my goal. That is a crushing defeat! But... we wont concentrate on that! Positive thinking - that's what this is going to be about!
So - day one is under our belts (as are alot of donuts and cheese burgers). We CAN do this!! You know - I just might end up liking elephant!
Alice =-)